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#1 09-04-2010 1:36am

Concern Charity Fundrazer
Member
Registered: 10-29-2005
Posts: 475

some (bad) jokes.

I went on a once in a lifetime holiday....never again.
Velcro-it's a real rip-off.
A neutron walks into a bar and asks for a pint.'How much is that?'asks the neutron.the barman replies 'There's no charge'
What's brown and sticky?A stick.
What do u call a man with...
A seagull on his head-Cliff
A spade in his head-Doug.
That's all (for now) folks.

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#2 09-04-2010 2:33pm

Pierre2
Member
From: France
Registered: 08-16-2009
Posts: 223

Re: some (bad) jokes.

found elsewhere

This guy goes on vacation to a tropical island. As soon as he gets off the plane, he hears drums. He thinks "Wow, this is cool." He goes to the beach, he hears the drums, he eats lunch, he hears drums, he goes to a luau, he hears drums. He tries to go to sleep, yet he hears drums.

This goes on for several nights, and gets to the point where the guy can't sleep at night because of the drums. Finally, he goes down to the front desk.

When he gets there, he asks the manager, "Hey! What's with these drums. Don't they ever stop? I can't get any sleep."

The manager says, "No! Drums must never stop. It's very bad if drums stop."

"Why?"

"When drums stop...bass solo begins."

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#3 09-04-2010 2:38pm

Pierre2
Member
From: France
Registered: 08-16-2009
Posts: 223

Re: some (bad) jokes.

Yet another

What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?


... a drummer

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#4 09-04-2010 9:31pm

Hollis
Member
Registered: 02-20-2005
Posts: 20

Re: some (bad) jokes.

What's the difference between a rock guitarist and a jazz guitarist?
A rock guitarist plays three chords for ten thousand people...

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#5 09-05-2010 1:19pm

sml
Member
Registered: 08-04-2007
Posts: 16

Re: some (bad) jokes.

How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they just steal somebody else's light

How do you know when the stage is level?
The drummer is drooling out of both sides of his mouth

What do call a successful musician?
A guy whose wife or girlfriend has 2 jobs.

What do you do if your bassist is drowning?
Throw him his amp.

How do you make a drummer's eyes light up?
Shine a flashlight in his ear.

How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb?
One, two, three... one, two, three.


Things mean a lot at the time   ...don't mean nothing later.

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#6 09-07-2010 9:10am

Pierre21
Member
Registered: 01-10-2005
Posts: 664
Website

Re: some (bad) jokes.

Pierre2 wrote:

found elsewhere

This guy goes on vacation to a tropical island. As soon as he gets off the plane, he hears drums. He thinks "Wow, this is cool." He goes to the beach, he hears the drums, he eats lunch, he hears drums, he goes to a luau, he hears drums. He tries to go to sleep, yet he hears drums.

This goes on for several nights, and gets to the point where the guy can't sleep at night because of the drums. Finally, he goes down to the front desk.

When he gets there, he asks the manager, "Hey! What's with these drums. Don't they ever stop? I can't get any sleep."

The manager says, "No! Drums must never stop. It's very bad if drums stop."

"Why?"

"When drums stop...bass solo begins."


Haha, I love this one.

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#7 09-07-2010 1:18pm

Concern Charity Fundrazer
Member
Registered: 10-29-2005
Posts: 475

Re: some (bad) jokes.

A husband and wife are watching a programme on tv called 'The female orgasm and how to express it'.When the programme is over the husband turns to the wife and asks 'How come u never tell me when you're having an orgasm?' and his wife smiles and says 'Because you're never there'

Last edited by Concern Charity Fundrazer (09-07-2010 1:22pm)

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